Imagine letting go of every thought or fear that is holding you back and instead, doing what you want to do, and being exactly who you want to be. That would be a liberating lifestyle wouldn’t it. But it's unrealistic to think we can fully just let go of what people think of us and the trepidation we feel. We're innately wired to care what other people think and that is okay; however, fear of judgment and opinions is something we have the control to minimize.
When caring about other people’s opinions alters your behavior, and restrains you from being your most authentic self, caring too much becomes perilous.
It is the people who matter the most to me who allow me to not second guess myself. Those closest to me empower me to be my most expressive and authentic self, and do so unapologetically. My goal has been to develop myself to the point where my instincts are so refined that I can trust them in any situation. The people who I am closest with are the people I always trust my instincts around, and never alter my behavior for. The next step is being able to translate that unapologetic authenticity and instinctual reliance into all social situations, not just with those who know us the best.
When we launched More Than Different with our mission of celebrating the differences in everyone and embracing individual authenticity, we were unsure what the general response would be. Colin and I started this brand because it embodies the kind of people we want to surround ourselves with and the lifestyle we strive to live, and we wanted to invite others to join in on this mission as well. Inevitably, not everyone is going to rock with MTD, but some will, and those people will support you and goad you to go all in on your goals, and be who you truly are.
It’s challenging to cultivate the optimal social circle, but it can be as simple as understanding the following concept and assigning the people in your life to either side of the spectrum: Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. The ones who make you second guess your instincts, make you hesitant to use your voice, or explore your curiosities, are the people you have to disconnect from and disregard. The people who love, trust, and support us unconditionally are people who we could never let down and who allow us to trust our instincts and maximize ourselves.
On an episode of our podcast last year, featuring popstar singer Chelsea Cutler, she revealed one of the keys to her ascension as an Artist, saying “It is truly about unapologetically putting yourself out there… unapologetically going up to bat for yourself.” The right people will support what you are trying to do and will gladly be there throughout the journey. Those who deprecate what you’re doing and aim to put you down, well, they aren’t the people we need to have in our circle.
Be who you truly are, no matter who surrounds you or what environment you are in, and do so unapologetically, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.
Brendan McNamara
Co-Founder of MTD